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Y2K Compliance
and Bonus Audio

Accordion Beatles
Y2K Compliance Statement and Bonus Audio

Originally posted January 1, 2000

Y2K Policy Statement

[Ahem. Cough Cough]
It seems that the fears were somewhat exaggerated, not by myself mind you. In fact, I was the voice of reason amid the panic.

My Macintosh G3 Minitower is actually Y29K compliant, and I have many good Maglites with lithium batteries. Even my old Mac Plus, which I bought in 1987, which has never needed servicing and still works like a charm, will run until the year 2049, unless I upgrade the system software from 6.x to 7.x, which is hardly worth it since I haven't used her since... well that's not true, I still use it for Chessmaster 2000. Again, Y2K rears its malevolent visage. Happily, the G3 whirrs on while the Plus sits in its box. But that old Mac was built, man, even the original clock battery is still working!!! And it's got its own battery compartment - it's not hard-wired to the mother board like the less-sophisticated PCs of that era.

Why didn't Bill Gates think of that? Why don't you ask him! Maybe IBM or Intel can help you.
It would be like asking Spiro Agnew or Herbert Hoover or Earl Warren, 'Why did we have to have a cold war?'

The Accordion Beatles site has been updated to be Y2K compliant, insofar as I have changed the copyright notices to reflect the new year, and have posted this Official Compliance Policy Statement. This was written after midnight of December 31, 1999 and only cost my time. I didn't hire any consultants, go to any Y2K websites, join any Y2K newsgroups or get on any Y2K mailing lists. The lights are still on and I watched television while the Tragically Hip played 'The Poets' live on international television from the Air Canada Centre, where I had seen them play last February, when they opened the venue as the first rock act ever to play there, before the Stones, even, by 3 days.

Following the TV stuff, I went out on the rooftop terrace and watched the fireworks at Battlefield Park and at the Stoney Creek Arena. Judging from past Victoria Day events, these displays were exceptional. Many nearby residents were having parties and letting off fireworks of their own as well. It was loud, joyous, raucous and festive. As I listened to the sounds of partying people shouting and honking horns near and far, echoing off the escarpment and the buildings, I watched as the dark gave way to blazing exploding rockets and the loud thunderous cannonades of the mortars, over that same place where in 1813, 60 British regulars and Natives surprised and overwhelmed 400 American invaders as they slept. I thought about how the noisemakers and festivities of new year's celebrations were remnants of ancient new year rituals, wherein loud noises were thought to scare away the demons of the old yaar and prevent them from following their victims into the new year. However, if you're a Windows user, no amount of noise may save you if you're still using a 16-bit version!

Aside from being Macintosh Y2K Complacent, I happen to be one of the enlightened folks who believes the millennium is not quite finished. Any scientist will tell you that calendar years are not like a person's age or the odometer on an automobile. The short truth is: THERE WAS NO YEAR ZERO. REPEAT: THERE WAS NO YEAR ZERO. The B.C. years went straight into the A.D. years (or if you like, the BCE before the CE). Any questions?

Please listen to our AUDIO Y2K Policy Statement as written by Strauss and co-opted by the music guy for the movie based on Arthur C. Clarke's seminal work of sci-fi, 2001: A Space Odyssey.

Originally posted January 1, 2000

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