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Y2K Compliance
and Bonus Audio
Y2K Compliance Statement and Bonus Audio
Originally posted January 1, 2000
AUDIO Y2K Policy Statement
[Ahem. Cough Cough]
It seems that the fears were somewhat exaggerated, not by myself mind you.
In fact, I was the voice of reason amid the panic.
My Macintosh G3 Minitower is actually Y29K compliant, and I have many good
Maglites with lithium batteries. Even my old Mac Plus, which I bought in
1987, which has never needed servicing and still works like a charm, will
run until the year 2049, unless I upgrade the system software from 6.x to
7.x, which is hardly worth it since I haven't used her since... well that's
not true, I still use it for Chessmaster 2000. Again, Y2K rears its malevolent
visage. Happily, the G3 whirrs on while the Plus sits in its box. But that
old Mac was built, man, even the original clock battery is still working!!!
And it's got its own battery compartment - it's not hard-wired to the mother
board like the less-sophisticated PCs of that era.
Why didn't Bill Gates think of that? Why don't you ask him! Maybe IBM or
Intel can help you.
It would be like asking Spiro Agnew or Herbert Hoover or Earl Warren, 'Why
did we have to have a cold war?'
The Accordion Beatles site has been updated to be Y2K compliant, insofar
as I have changed the copyright notices to reflect the new year, and have
posted this Official Compliance Policy Statement. This was written after
midnight of December 31, 1999 and only cost my time. I didn't hire any consultants,
go to any Y2K websites, join any Y2K newsgroups or get on any Y2K mailing
lists. The lights are still on and I watched television while the Tragically
Hip played 'The Poets' live on international television from the Air Canada
Centre, where I had seen them play last February, when they opened the venue
as the first rock act ever to play there, before the Stones, even, by 3
days.
Following the TV stuff, I went out on the rooftop terrace and watched the
fireworks at Battlefield Park and at the Stoney Creek Arena. Judging from
past Victoria Day events, these displays were exceptional. Many nearby residents
were having parties and letting off fireworks of their own as well. It was
loud, joyous, raucous and festive. As I listened to the sounds of partying
people shouting and honking horns near and far, echoing off the escarpment
and the buildings, I watched as the dark gave way to blazing exploding rockets
and the loud thunderous cannonades of the mortars, over that same place
where in 1813, 60 British regulars and Natives surprised and overwhelmed
400 American invaders as they slept. I thought about how the noisemakers
and festivities of new year's celebrations were remnants of ancient new
year rituals, wherein loud noises were thought to scare away the demons
of the old yaar and prevent them from following their victims into the new
year. However, if you're a Windows user, no amount of noise may save you
if you're still using a 16-bit version!
Aside from being Macintosh Y2K Complacent, I happen to be one of the enlightened
folks who believes the millennium is not quite finished. Any scientist will
tell you that calendar years are not like a person's age or the odometer
on an automobile. The short truth is: THERE WAS NO YEAR ZERO. REPEAT: THERE
WAS NO YEAR ZERO. The B.C. years went straight into the A.D. years (or if
you like, the BCE before the CE). Any questions?
Please listen to our AUDIO Y2K
Policy Statement as written by Strauss and co-opted by the music guy
for the movie based on Arthur C. Clarke's seminal work of sci-fi, 2001:
A Space Odyssey.
Originally posted January 1, 2000
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